Light at the end of the tunnel

Only 6 more dialysis treatments left!!! WooHoo!!

For those of you not familiar with dialysis, let me tell you, this machine is a miracle in itself.  The way the blood goes into the filter and then the filter works as your kidney would is incredible. Medical technology has come a long way.  Thank God for this!!  Without it, Bradley and so many others would not be alive today.



Because we knew Bradley's dialysis treatments were temporary, he had a 'tesio' catheter placed in his chest instead of the fistula in the arm which is the usual procedure for long term patients.  This was a blessing because if Bradley had to have a fistula that would mean they would have to use a needle each time to access his vein for dialysis.  At least this way, Bradley had no discomfort whatsoever while getting dialysis treatments.  They just hooked the machine up to his catheter, and Bradley was 'free' for 4 hours to do whatever he wanted within the comfy confines of his chair.

These weren't just ordinary chairs...they were really comfortable recliners that had their own tv/computer touch screen.  Bradley loved playing solataire and some of the other games on the computer, as well as, watching American Idol with all the staff.

Bradley made such great friends with a lot of the nurses that work there.  They have been so great to him since day one.  One of the male nurses, Justin, became Bradley's bff at dialysis.  Whenever Bradley would show up there, the first thing he would ask, 'Is Justin working today?' If so, Bradley would have this huge smile on his face and they would goof off together the rest of the evening....so much that I think they moved Justin to the other side of the center so he would concentrate on work instead of goofing off. Haha

There were many a times when I was caught in the imaginary crossfire between those two.  Justin would duck behind the nurses desk and then poke his head up like he had a machine gun pointed at Bradley.  Then Bradley would throw some imaginary bombs his way...hey whatever it takes to pass the time right!!???

Leaving dialysis is going to be a little sad...only a little sad though!! We can definitely go back to visit every now and again, and Bradley has hopefully made some great friends for life.

Happy Easter!!

I wanted to share this song with you in celebration of Easter.  It is one of my favorites. The words are so powerful...'this child can face uncertain days because he lives...'  Amen.

Happy Easter!! Enjoy!!

The warning signs of Chronic Kidney Disease

I found this video on you tube describing the warning signs of kidney disease and thought it would be perfect to share with you all; especially since it portrays a teenagers sense of humor very well. :-)

I haven't shown this to Bradley yet, but I'm sure he is going to get a laugh out of it. He has the best sense of humor ever. That's one thing that has never left him, even throughout all that he's been going through.

Hope you enjoy the video and please take note of the warning signs of Chronic Kidney Disease.

The first few hours

I have to really stop and think about the first few hours we were at the hospital that night in November.  So much has happend in the past months, and it all just seems like a blurr.

Usually I have my cell phone off at night, so I'm actually not really sure how I got the call at 11:30pm from his doctor.  All I can say is that God was definitely looking after him that night and knew he needed to get to the hospital ASAP.

I remember stumbling through the darkness trying to get ready to go to the hospital; making phone calls to my parents and his dad; getting Bradley up to tell him we needed to go to the hospital; but honestly I can't remember how I was feeling. 

Probably scared, anxious, shock...I don't think I quite knew how to feel or what to think. I had never had to deal with my kids being this sick, so I think I was just going through the motions at that point to get him the help that he needed.

Bradley was very sick, so he was quite lethargic and quiet.  I remember telling him that everything was going to be ok.  I told him the doctor had called saying something was wrong with his kidneys, and they needed to check him out at the hospital.  I also told him Nanny and Pa and his Dad were on their way, so that actually made him smile. (Pa is my dad, Bradley's grandpa and kidney donor)

I remember walking into the ER with Bradley.  Going up to the admissions desk and telling the lady behind the desk that the doctor wanted him to come in because he was in kidney failure.

She immediately went to get the nurse, and they hustled him right back into a room.  Now, I 'm sure you all have been to the ER where you have sat for hours and hours??  Well that's what I was always used to whenever we had to go to the ER.  This immediate attention was a shock to me, and this sense of urgency made me very nervous and scared. 

However, I hid these emotions from Bradley and just sat with him in that room full of doctors and nurses holding his hand, praying, and hoping for the best...

When did you find out??

The question I probably hear the most is...when did you find out? Had he been sick for a long time?

The answer is we don't really know.

He seemed fine up until the middle of October, 2010. Before then, he passed his physical every single year. When he was little, he had all the basic childhood illnesses; ear infections, colds, stomach viruses, a slight case of chicken pox because he was vaccinated, but nothing out of the ordinary.

In October, I started noticing that he seemed very tired. I kept asking him if he felt ok, and he would say yes.  When I got home from work in the evenings, he would be sleeping.  Then he would get up for a few hours to eat, do his homework, and be in bed again by 7:30pm. This started to worry me, but he kept telling me he felt fine.  I thought to myself, 'well maybe he's just going through a growth spurt.' or 'maybe 8th grade is really hard.'

Looking back now, I do remember a few days here and there throughout September and October when he complained of a headache and under his eyes looked a bit puffy, but he has always been prone to allergies. I just thought maybe ragweed was getting the best of him this year. (now I know that the headaches were from high blood pressure, and the puffiness in the face from fluid--yikes!! how scary!!)

So I knew for a few months that he wasn't quite himself, but I couldn't quite figure out what was going on. I was getting ready to make him a doctor's appointment for the fatigue when he started throwing up one morning after breakfast.  I was almost relieved because I thought 'yes! it's just the flu!! That's why he's been so tired. It totally makes sense!!' 

He stayed in bed that day, but he only threw up that one time.  I took good care of him that day. I went to the store to get him gingerale, crackers, soup, Gatorade...gulp...gatorade??? Yes I probably contributed to his electrolytes being sky high when he finally landed in the ER, but I'm a mom...those are things moms give their kids when they have the stomach flu...right??? I cry thinking that my simple loving gesture could have easily killed him, but I had no idea he was in kidney failure...

So anyway...he stayed in bed that day. The next day was Sunday, and he seemed to be feeling better. So, I too felt better. He went to school Monday and Tuesday, and everything seemed back to normal.  Then on Wednesday, he threw up again after dinner.  I would have totally thought something was going on at that point, but my 10-year-old son, Zachary, also said he wasn't feeling good. I just thought maybe we still had this stupid stomach flu running through the house.

Bradley and Zachary stayed home from school the next day, Thursday. Neither one of them threw up again that day.  I cleaned the whole house top to bottom with lysol. I'm still not sure whether or not Zachary had a virus. I'm thinking maybe he was playing off of Bradley to get some time off from school...just a theory. :-)

On Friday, they both said they were feeling better, so they went to school. Bradley had a Halloween dance at school that night, and he was super excited!! I picked him up from school, and we went to CVS to get the finishing touches for his costume. He was going as a Vampire!!

The dance was a success! He had a great time!! I was so happy for him. Things seemed to be going great again.  He continued to feel good throughout the weekend, and he went Trick-or-Treating on Halloween that Sunday night with his siblings and some friends.

Monday morning, November 1, 2010, Bradley woke up not feeling good. He looked horrible. His face was extremely puffy, and he looked really sick. He was complaining of a bad headache.  I had him go lay down, and he threw up everywhere. I immediately knew something bad was going on; however, I was still thinking Mono or meningitis. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought kidney failure...

I took him in to see his pediatrician that day thinking he had a bad virus or infection. They checked his blood pressure, and it was 146/90.  Because of his high blood pressure and the puffiness in the face, they decided to check his urine for evidence of kidney problems.  Sure enough, his urine was full of protein which is an indicator that something is not right with the kidneys.

The doctor was very calm and very professional. Being in the medical profession myself, I think back to that day and wonder if he knew at that point that he was going to be dealing with a very sick child. 

He gave us a slip to go get bloodwork done at the lab downstairs, and he also gave us a prescription for blood pressure medicine.  We were to get the labs drawn, pick up the prescription, and then come back to the office in the morning for another blood pressure check.  We never made it to that appointment.

At 11:30pm on November 1, 2010, I recieved a call from his doctor stating that Bradley was in full kidney failure and that he needed to be admitted to the hospital ASAP.

Still in shock and not quite grasping what that meant, I called my parents who lived 2 hours away, called Bradley's father who happend to be in Massachusetts working, and then headed to the hospital with Bradley.

This is where our story begins...

Welcome...grab your tissues...and get ready to experience...A Kidney for Bradley.

For most parents, hearing that your child has a serious illness is one of your worst nightmares.  Up until a few months ago, it was mine as well.

On November 1, 2010, our lives changed forever.

My oldest son, Bradley-14, was diagnosed with kidney failure.  This diagnosis hit us like a mack truck in the middle of the night, but over the past 6 months, things have become somewhat clearer.  We have become closer as a family, and we are adjusting to our new life.

Bradley is scheduled for a kidney transplant on May 10, 2011.  My Dad is the donor. He is an amazing man.

My mother finally convinced me to start writing about this whole process; not just as therapy for myself, but to also share our experience with others.  It has been quite a rollercoaster ride; lots of emotions and lots of tears...tears of frustration, tears of sadness and pain, but also tears of joy.

Alot has happend in the past 6 months.  I am going to do my best to catch you all up before the big day on May 10th.

I do not claim to be the best writer, so bear with me as I share a mother's thoughts and feelings with you.  I will try to give you more of an inside look into the complexity of the kidney transplant process and how this little bean shaped organ works to rid your body of toxins among other things.

Also, if you are anything like me, you may want to grab a box of tissues.  I am thinking about buying stock in kleenex because I have used so many over the past months. :-)

Lots of love,
-Tina